Candles

Hey. Before I sleep. I wanted to share a bit of what's on my mind. I've been thinking. About. Well what I want. Since, it being my birthday yesterday (& it seems to be dragging through the weekend. Thanks guys y'all make me feel very special), everyone's been asking me what I want. What do I want as a gift. What do I want for my birthday. And sofeah and Elizabeth asked me to write a list. When I sat down to write that list, I tried to make it as realistic as possible. It started out ok, 1000000 blueberries and strawberries lol. Then I started writing down the impossible, "An Altus flute, or if you have disposable cash, MURA 😍" and "Burkat piccolo". And there was a ukelele somewhere. But these were jokes lah. From no. 1 it was all a joke. Because no one could truly get me what I wanted lah. I realized that all I really wanted was to be carefree an happy. And (along with passing Chinese O's and a farm), that's how I ended the list.

And I said I've been very happy, an that y'all make me feel special. But there's aways still that gap. That painful gap, everytime I think about it the gap enlargest. But nevermind lah. just my train of thought.
Good night.